Custom Search
Most of my life I have chosen to be a loner for the simple reasoning that it is hard for me to stay focused and hold focused conversations with people. My mind has the tendency to jump around in thoughts at random times throughout the day, I've used this "flaw" as a ground point for my thought process. The idea was that if my mind is going to jump around sporatically from thought to thought then why not put it to some good use? I developed a skill of sorts where my life revolves around scenarios(what ifs), any given situation I can play through my head and think up what would happen if the event, situation, or conversation had taken a different turn. The major down side is I really do lack a social life as this choice has left me as a prisoner of my own mind. Don't get me wrong, I actually like this lifestyle as human interaction isn't something that interests me.
My path allows me to freely think without too much outside peer pressure. This path also allows me to delve deeper into my main interest in life, technology, which I like to work with on a broad scale from a bit of computer programming, designing computers, networking, soldering, and general repair of electronic devices. I have a few really good friends that understand and respect my choice to live a secluded lifestyle, to these good friends of mine I am not just a good friend but I'm also a resource that they can come to for my views on situations and for my help in the field of technology.
When I'm in my own element so to speak of working with technology, listening to music I enjoy or dealing with scenarios my scatterbrained thoughts subside to a certain extent and I can focus on the task at hand. The best way to look at this is a mental block of sorts, the same can be said about my anti-social aspect. In person my scatterbrained side takes full charge, it really is like a block as my mind goes blank. When I'm writing, listening to music, working with anything technical or dealing with scenarios in my head I am at the top of my game and in control of my mind. A step I have recently taken is using a notebook so that I can come back to the stray recurring thoughts at a later date, the idea is if I can get all these recurring thoughts out of the way then maybe my mind will settle down a bit.
How can this scatterbrained thought process be useful? The simple answer is if you are looking for different viewpoints on any given situation then I'm a good person to come to as I can give you multiple answers at a fairly rapid rate. From a logical stand point though the only people that could really find this useful would be military personnel who want to be prepared for any possibility or want a second opinion on a past mission. For the most part my thought process is mainly based around analysis skills which isn't something that is really needed or used in the everyday world by the average person.
In the eye of the beholder this kind of lifestyle and thought process could be viewed as a flaw on many levels but on the other hand the usefulness in the knowledge department could be considered a gift. My personal view is I'm sacrificing a normal social life for knowledge that can be shared. How do I share my knowledge if I'm anti-social? Simple, I write my thoughts, ideas, and whatever else crosses my mind down in a notebook and then I expand and write a document around the said thought, idea or whatever it was then I post it on my webpage for the people of the world to see. In the end, is this scatterbrained, mental block, anti-social lifestyle really a handicap or is it actually a blessing in disguise? I like to think of it as a blessing as it really does make me stand out as being unique and useful in an odd and twisted sort of way.